Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I need water and some morals
Randomize
