I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
