Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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