a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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