she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize