do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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