You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize