Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
