I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
