Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
