i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
