We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Buhtt sex?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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