Sry I called you an 8
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
