i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
