you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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