Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
