Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
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