I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
it's like heaven, but drunker
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Randomize
