I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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