Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
She bit a glass in half.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
