Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
