some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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