Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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