I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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