So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I will pee on everything he values.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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