He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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