haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
