This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
So many bounce houses so little time
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
