I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize