ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
