Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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