You really coming over, don't trick.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
