sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
