If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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