butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
