He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
