Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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