just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
