Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
