toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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