This girl is more easily done than said...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
