I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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