That's intense
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
