You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
honey bunches of taint.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
