he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
