at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
