omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
