seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Why is your signature on my underwear?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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