I need help removing her.
She announced her abortion via fbk
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize