Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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